God with Us

Almost exactly two years ago, I posted this and today it seems fitting to revisit it:

Christmas. Even the word "Christmas" makes us think of cheer, of wonder, of festivities and fun. Yet, for so many it will carry such sorrow, and heavy hearts will sit under lit up trees. There are many reasons that hearts will be heavy each year, but this year I think of the two families I know that between Thanksgiving time and now have each lost a son. One was 12, one just a baby. I can feel the shattering of their hearts into so many little pieces. And, my heart is broken...again.

Sorrow, pain, death, imperfection: our world is so full of it. I sit at a funeral watching a mom look at her 12 year old son's casket, and I remember. I watch the scene that should never be, dad and mom following their lifeless child out of the sanctuary and I know what it is like to go home. It all seems so wrong. The email that the baby won't make it through the night, and he doesn't. And hopes, dreams, lives crumble. These pictures of death happen all over the world, every day. Because our world is fallen, imperfect, not as God intended it to be.

As I sat at that funeral, and watched mom and dad follow their son's casket out, reaching up high behind them were risers in the shape of a giant Christmas tree and it was all lit up. This scene is etched clearly in my mind because as I watched this family and their shattered world, I was reminded. That tree in all its shining wonder reminded me what this season represents. Even as so many will wade through dark waters this Christmas, they do not have to do it without HOPE. God did not turn His back on our imperfect world. He left perfection and entered into our hurt with us. He came to us and brought hope all wrapped up in the form of a tiny baby. "Behold, the virgin shall be with child and shall bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel," which translated means, "God with us." He came to us and offers a way to be with him forever, promising that one day he will dry all the tears and heal all the broken hearts. We are not alone, and this life is not all there is. God with us. Hope.

Please pray for these two families and that they could experience the hope of Christ during these difficult times.

Since that Christmas of 2010, we went through another Christmas surrounded by hurting people and now in 2012 this one is no different. Today another unthinkable tragedy has struck out East and everyone is left wondering "Who could do such a thing to children?" And, "How will these familes move forward?" And, "Why did it happen?" And the truth is, there are no easy answers to those difficult questions. And THIS is why we celebrate Christmas. We celebrate to remember - God with us.

If you have placed your trust in Jesus Christ, then all the terrible things taking place should not leave is in fear or disheartened. God tells us over and over and over in His Word not to fear. John 16:33 tells us to take heart because He has overcome the world (and that includes all the evil in it). The hard things should drive us deeper into His Word so we can know more of Him. They should also lead us to tell others of the hope that we have because God not only came to be with us, but make a way for us to be with Him. I Peter 3:15 says to always be ready to give an answer to others about the hope you have.

If you have never placed your trust in Jesus Christ there is no better time than now. He is the only one in whom you will ever find real hope and peace. Check out this link and it will walk you through what Jesus did for you and how you can respond. http://www.cefonline.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=section&id=19&Itemid=100033

And They Went With Haste...

"And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby lying in the manger." Luke 2:16

"When they saw the star, they rejoiced exceedinly with great joy.  And going into the house they saw the child with Mary his mother, and they fell down and worshiped him." Matthew 2:10-11

The shepherds got it, the wise men got it, and my kids get it, so why don't I?

Christmas time comes and my kids can't wait to get the nativities out!  It is literally one of their absolute favorite things about decorating for Christmas.  The big man wants to help place each piece carefully on the mantel this year and can't quit talking about how much he loves getting this out every year.  He has all sorts of ideas about how it should be arranged.

Then come the Veggie Tale ones made for play and every kid, no matter the age is down on hands and knees in wonder of those little characters even though they could play with them at any time of the year.

Then there is the box filled with tiny boxes each containing a different part of the scene and I am saving it...for what?  I don't know.  For that one great night when we will sit down and read the story and pull out the pieces as the book tells us to.  Only the night doesn't come, and doesn't come and they beg and plead to break into that box...to see the baby.  And what do I do?  I tell them no again and again...wait...we'll do it later...  Wait for what?  Should we ever wait to get on our hands and knees and wonder at what God did?  Should we ever wait to see the baby again?

They find the box, and are thrilled with the contents, and have it all set up just so.  I discover this, and scold, and miss what the shepherds, and wise men, and my children all know. 

We should ALWAYS go with haste to see the baby again and rejoice with GREAT JOY when we find Him and the hope that He holds.

They do it so well, every year.  They hurry to find Him.  They rejoice at the discovery and they linger long at the scene.  I hurry...but not to find Him.  I rejoice at a great find...but it isn't Him.  I linger long...but on tasks that someday won't matter. 

Tomorrow is a new day and it will start with the opening of a very special box...and there will be great joy...and we will linger long.

4 x 2 = Happy Birthday!

I am sure it was yesterday that I was sitting in the rocker recliner in my living room holding two babies and thinking how fast the time would go and I just wanted to soak in every minute!  Suddenly, here I am, 4 years later and they've grown tall, and the blonde hair gets darker, and they talk much, and laugh often.

And I know that the next time I blink, they will be beautiful young women, grown and starting out in life on their own.  But, for today, they are 4 and I will try to soak in every minute of this time.

Their many giggles and big grins

Their goofiness and fun loving nature

Their love to sing, and dance, and read books, and learn new things

Their sweet natures expressed COMPLETELY differently one from the other

Their love of the outdoors and all things active from the trampoline, to roller blading, to wrestling with Dad and their brothers

Their friendship with each other

These two are one tight pair, yet so uniquely different.  One is so feminine, sweet and sappy, loves to hug everyone, loves all things girly, is a social butterfly, tender through and through, but full of strong will when she wants to be, loves to talk about God.  The other shows her love through teasing and giving you a punch on the arm, she sings constantly, laughs often about everything, loves to talk about God, is a little more reserved when it comes to others but once she warms up will be your best friend, surprises you with random hugs, is independent and can do anything she sets her mind to.  

They are each a gift to our family and how appropriate that today on the day of thanks, we get to remember and be thankful for when they were graciously given to us as a part of our family.

Decade

A decade has passed since I looked into this sweet little face for the first time.

 A decade since I saw this smile for the first time.

A decade since I was given one of the greatest gifts, the gift of being a mom.  I am so thankful that God chose to give me this boy. He has such a tender heart toward the Lord and the lost. He is helpful and considerate of his siblings and others.  We have always called him our 100% kid.  You never have to wonder how he is feeling or what he is thinking.  He is always 100% of whatever he is...and I love that about him!

 A dear friend wrote today that she hoped he would be brave like David, forgiving as Joseph, and ambitious as Paul.  I would add to that, I pray he will have the integrity of Daniel, the faith of Abraham, the loyalty of Caleb, and the heart of Jesus.

 I don't know how we went so quickly from that tiny, little guy to this active, responsible young man.

 I don't know what the next decade will bring for him or me as his mom.  I don't know where God is going to lead him in life.

 I do know that I want to cherish the gift of every day the Lord gives me with him.

 I do know that when I look into his face, it makes me want to be a better mom.

 I do know that he has extended me so much grace as I have figured this mom thing out.  I know he and I are learning and growing together. 

 I do know that whatever happens, and wherever life leads him, I pray he will always choose to look up and keep his focus on the one who holds the answers.

So another decade from now, I pray that his gaze will still be fixed above.

Lessons From Haiti, Part 2

Have you ever found your self going through an experience and thinking that what you are learning is not spiritual enough? 

Maybe I am missing it, God. 

Maybe I didn't pay enough attention.

Or maybe someimtes it is the simple lessons that we need the most.

Haiti is an extremely poor country.  It is sad to see how people live and the terrible things they have to face on a regular basis.  Despite being beautiful, it is also a very dirty country with garbage everywhere.  There is nothing easy about the lives of the people there.  It is also a dark country spiritually.  People are lost and many are mixed up in evil practices and bound by fear.

However, none of this is what struck me while I was there.  It isn't that i didn't see it, feel sad about it, or care about it...I did.  It is heart wrenching to take it all in.  It is just that I wasn't walking around with this heaviness as a result of it and with a new found desire to help.  The thing is, I think God broke much of that in me long before I got there.  I knew I was visiting a place with many different needs and I had seen some similar needs in other places.  I just thought that was why I was going and something God would have me take away from my time there. 

God impressed something so different on my heart.  He is there.  Big, I know.  You are probably thinking, "Are you kidding me?!"  No, I'm not.  I felt like He kept showing me that He is there...and everywhere.  I mean I knew that.  I have been told that my whole life.  God is everywhere, I get it.  But I didn't, not in the right way.  I went to Haiti focusing on what many told me I would experience and feel.  I focused on the bad, the dark, the sad.  Growing up, this was my default mode.  It was easy for me to focus on the scary, the bad, the sad and I have spent years changing that pattern.  Here I was slipping back into it though.  So, God needed to show me that yes, there is spiritual darkness in Haiti but His light is there as well and even more powerful.  Yes, there is evil there but God is visibly at work as well.  Yes, there are sad things but the joy of the Lord is visibly present in people as well.  He is there, and His presence can be felt not just by me but the people that live there, and His joy is eveident in them.  Though darkness exists there, God's presence does as well and He is much bigger.  So I felt darkness, and saw hurt, and saw terrible living conditions, and heard of living in fear, but I also saw Him.  I saw believers filled with His joy and saw Him working in their lives and doing amazing things!

Some of the ladies arriving at the conference

The ladeis holding up their new Bibles

Our cargo arriving, PTL!

One of the breakout sessions

Playing a game the ladies taught us

 My friend Johanne

Another game the ladies taught us.  The sweet thing about this picture is you can see the joy written on their faces and they never do things like this where they just have fun together as women.

Lessons From Haiti, Part 1

God in all His sovereignty has better plans

...and truly aren't we glad He does.  Even when they don't seem as good as ours, even when we have spent much time planning, even when it hurts, His plans are always so much better.  This lesson was one our team was quickly confronted with on our trip.

Early morning wake-up to catch a shuttle to the airport on the 12th and...no shuttle.  What we didn't know at the time was that this was only the beginning of absolutely nothing going as planned for the rest of the trip.  Once we arrived in Haiti every detail of the conference began to unravel until the only thing that seemed for sure was that the people who were going to speak were still going to speak...though when, to who, and where were a little sketchy. :)  Not to mention, our cargo with all the conference supplies including blankets for the women to sleep on, goody bags we were going to hand out at the beginning, conference programs for them and much, much more did not show up until Monday afternoon.  Most of the ladies came in on Sunday and the conference started Monday morning.

When your best laid plans fall apart what do you do?  Pray.  Trust God in His sovereignty.  Wait on Him.  Roll with it!  20 women being flexible and rolling with whatever the day brought?  That's right!  I was blessed to be a part of the most amazing team of women who were so flexible and patient.  We really never knew how each day would look from one day to the next, but God knew and His plans were better right from the start.

Everything worked so much batter than we could have imagined.  We ended up having 167 ladies instead of 150 so we couldn't have handed out bags at the beginning anyway.  We didn't have enough so we needed to make a few and then rearrange what was in them to make sure everyone got some things.  We had breakout sessions and main sessions planned but circumstances forced us to only ever have two different sessions going.   God knew.  We were supposed to have 5 translators and ended up with 2 so we could only do two session at a time anyway.  When the speakers all got rearranged they ended being lumped together perfectly by topic...only God can do such amazing things!  We were humbled and grateful.

Can we trust God with our plans?  I think the better question is, can we let go of our plans and trust God with His?  Can we accept that whateve happens is in the sovereign hands of God and choose to have a good attitude anyway, choose to trust God anyway, choose joy anyway? 

I opened my backpack today looking for my glasses...they weren't there.  I am pretty sure they are somewhere in Haiti.  At the moment I discovered it I could feel the tug on my heart saying how are you going to respond?  How?  It wil cost hundreds of dollars to get a new pair.  It was totally a God thing the way I got the last pair.  There is such a temptation to be negative.  Good attitude anway, trust God anyway, joy anyway...  I am sure someone can use those glasses and I am sure God can provide new ones.  He is sovereign in the big and the little.

Team prayer the night before we left for Haiti

My college friend and me

The old well at the Open Door Church compound

where we stayed

The mission house on the right and church on left



The school within the compound

The clinic in the compound

View from the roof of the mission house

What have I experienced in Haiti?

warm sunsine

perfect temps (not the sweltering heat expected)

beautiful brown faces of women

adorable children who love to laugh and giggle at us

dirty streets with much garbage

lush vegitation

very dark nights

spicy, yummy, unique food

a cold, short on sleep night

a comfortable restfull night

 praising God with sisters in Christ from Haiti

much laughter, singing and dancing

times of sharing with tears of brokeness and joy

the need for MUCH flexibility

new Haitian and American friends

prayer and more prayer

poverty and great needs

poorly cared for animals

crisp clean clothes of Haitian people who know how to work hard

the presence of God

Haiti

I made it to Haiti and it is beautiful here, life is not easy but beautiful people and countryside!  We are staying in Open Door Church's compound.  It really is very nice and we have been so blessed by the people here.  We landed late morning and spent the day just getting to know the place and the people.  We got to take a walk outside the compound to see the orphanage they are building and along the way got to spend time with the sweetest kids ever!  Tomorrow we will have church and then begin prepping for the conference which starts Monday morning.  Our cargo with many things for the conference did not make it and may not till Monday well after the conference starts.  Please pray for a miracle here as part of that was blankets for the women who be staying here at the compound for the conference.  They will have nothing to sleep on but cement.  It is such an amazing opportunity to be a part of this conference as these women have never experienced anything like this where they are pampered, taught, given gifts and even get to make a trip to the beach which is unheard of.  Please pray that these women will experience the incredible love God has for them personally.

Randomness

Sadly, this blog a has been a little neglected.  I figured the best way to get back at it was some randomness to show you what we have been up to.  So what have we been doing?

Trying to get good picture of everyone.  Getting a good picture of all 5 has become quite the challenge!  We are making good memories though :)

Snuggling with bears better known as "puppies" to these two

Visiting with good friends



Accomplishing a decent picture of everyone

 Thinking we are hiding with the grapes we took :)

 Having fun in the snow with family

 Playing with cousins (I loved this one because unintentionally they both posed exactly the same way!)

 Turning new snow shoes into stunt skies on hardened drifts (Middle Man)

 Swimming with friends

 Yelling...just for the pure fun of it! (Don't you love that the word "noise" is in the background?!)

 Being pure sweetness